I have been so immersed in manga-reading (and re-reading) lately that I had spent less time on the Net. The other day some of my friends tried to persuade me to watch the anime Naruto but somehow I still very much prefer the manga version. I got the impression that they didn’t quite get why I would fancy a non-moving, black-and-white form of entertainment over a, well, moving and coloured one, and hey, I myself am currently contemplating on that subject too… at any rate I’ve always found reading an extremely enjoyable activity. Not to say that I don’t enjoy movies (I know practically every movie under the sun… ok, not. Hehe) but if, say, a movie is based on a book and I have read that book, by some means I would always find the book much more satisfying and compelling as judged against the movie version (Well, The Lord of The Rings are an exception, they are darn good;p).
Anyways… a parcel from my parents arrived on Thursday which totally made my day (thanks Mak and Abah!). Although some of my requested stuff were missing (or incorrectly sent- like the Carera pens, I specifically stated model B-7, not B-8, Bob, and Reporter. hehe) but it didn’t really matter- all the food stuff more than made up for it =) But what’s this- ‘The Exorcism of Emily Rose’ DVD?! You know I do NOT watch horror movies, Abah! *sigh* It didn’t prevent the girls from flocking to my room to watch it though (whilst I parked myself on my bed reading mangas) but unfortunately for them, the cd was spoiled halfway into the story (“hantu baru je nak keluar”, according to them). Oh well. These things happen ;p
I know I’m a bore… it must be the weather. Hehehe. A lovely thing to note though- today it snowed! Awesome.
A paperweight on my desk ;)
An early December picture of snow
What would you do when practically everybody’s been telling you that you look a little, er, chubbier (they’re just being nice, aren’t they) since the previous couple of months and you yourself knew it was useless to indulge yourself further in self-denial as the weighing scale would not fib on the fact that you have just gained 2kg in a short couple of weeks (and counting, you can feel it somehow) and that there must be a fair reason to the fresh stiffness you experienced every time you tried to button up your jeans? Alright, you know that I know you know the answer already (don’t mind me, this is the after-effect of one of my midnight blues), but here goes anyway: you go on a diet.
I was never one to be obsessed with my weight and all, but sincerely speaking, I myself am quite alarmed by my present eating pattern. I’ve always been a big eater since the dawning of days, but nothing quite prepared me for this sort of food rampage I am on ever since my arrival in this foreign land. My theoretical conviction concerning the root of this problem lays in the truth of me terribly missing local Malaysian food- more specifically, traditional Malay delicacies. And oh, let’s prod deeper and be more explicit about it, why not. I’m specifically talking about ikan bakar (preferably fresh-water ones) with kuah asam, telur ikan masak lemak, udang harimau masak merah, sayur pucuk paku, pucuk manis (dan segala pucuk lah) masak lemak/berlada, sayur rebung masak lemak, sambal belacan, tempoyak, cencaluk, and practically every kind of ulam that ever existed on this good earth, especially………. Haha, it’s no big secret, my dear family members will spill the beans (note the pun later on! Lol) in the comment box anyway… good ol’ petai.
Aha, I can see your face contorting with unreserved disgust already, but don’t be too hasty in passing bad judgment on their already moldy reputation. These fellas augment your appetite like no other, and I brush my teeth like, three times after eating them, so no harm done, really! I daresay that those who do not eat these yummy (even if a tad unusual) beans are missing out on one of the incredible wonders of life. Yes, they are that good. And oh, how could I simply forget to mention my all-time favourite breakfast meal, nasi lemak? My mouth happily watered just at the measly thought of it (and the picture of nasi lemak at the stall nearby our house my dad sent me yesterday did not help to lessen my cravings at all ;p) and don’t even get me started on other cultures’ dishes like briyani and chicken tandoori (super-duper yummy!) and char kuey tiaw (Planet Curry’s ones are the finest!), we might never finish this entry by dawn.
So the theory goes that I tried to make up for the lack of scrumptious halal food (note that it isn’t merely halal food I’m talking about) in this part of the world by scraping off every halal ones I could get my teeth on to the shameful extent of licking off pots and pans (don’t imagine the sight in a gross way). I drank a lot of juice, piled up on chocolate, chips, and cookies, and ate at least two platefuls of rice every night. Hunger pangs seemed to strike me all the time and the pain was double the ones I had had back in home. I noticed at some point that I wasn’t eating healthily and of proper quantity, but I secretly blamed it on the cold weather. Hehe. Moreover, green vegetables are extremely difficult to get hold of in this season and the closest thing we could get to bayam and sawi are… carrots and potatoes. I’m not really sure how these whole facts correlated with one another, but they relayed the same outcome- I was splendidly on my way to the realm of high blood pressure and diabetes and spare tyres. Helloo there.
Therefore, with great courage in hand, I set on a mission not too long ago (in fact, the day before yesterday) to prevent the swift increase of my cheeks’ circumferences and superfluous adipose tissues and blood pressure and so forth, which consists of tricky steps quite difficult to be accomplished for my part. Nevertheless, I will step forward without fear… (I know I sound soo fake).
Step 1: Eat one round of rice daily, instead of two, three and four (sorry abah, I can’t talk on spoonful terms yet)
Step 2: Do daily sit-ups
Step 3: Stop buying chocolate and chips
Step 4: Perform puasa sunat more often
Step 5: Do face exercise (hahaha, my father taught me this one)
Step 6: Eat more cereals with fibre and wholemeal bread
Step 7: Never forget to take my vitamins
Any more tips? =)
Waiting for mashrudka (public transport in the form of a van) to go home at 4.30pm from nearby the academy
Satisfaction is something formidable to come by. During the wee hours of night, when all but few have drifted to slumberland, I would often suffer from this terrible ache of loneliness inside of me. Everything comes back to haunt me- the unpleasant guilt I would always bear towards my parents, the feeling that I haven’t achieved anything truly momentous in my life, the resentment (used very lightly in this context) towards my hardworking comrades followed by the routine I-hate-myself phase, the fear for my fate in future lives...
Sometimes my emotion might even push me further to the extent that I would imagine (or is it real?) myself living this life as a fake, that there is some loose screw somewhere impairing the whole assemble of my existence. That I haven’t done what I’m meant to do, that all the good things I did were simply lucky twists of fate, that failure is endorsing my every stride, ooh the usual phobia I guess. Perhaps it’s just my hormones at work. But this feeling of uncertainty- suddenly Heisenberg’s Law of Uncertainty pops in mind. Haha- has persisted too long a time to be completely ignored. I need answers… (now I sound like some freaking character in pseudo-psycho Hollywood flicks. Creepy.).
What I need… is someone to talk to. Someone who can really understand this unsettling chapter I’m going through, who won’t laugh at me and call me an overly-conscious geek (although admittedly I am), who, granted, shares my sentiment upon some… things. Anything. I can think of a few people who virtually fit in the criteria aforementioned, but what can I say… geographical boundaries are such a nuisance.
I guess the point of this entry is: I’m missing my friends.
A cup of cappucino to jazz up my day =)
I am on the brink of losing my writing spirit, I really am. It’s a little bit different from writer’s block because when you have writer’s block, it is not because you don’t want to write- you just can’t spill out your feelings in words without sounding like a dim idiot. But lately I’ve been doggedly trying to sit down and write, and by some certain reasons as yet unascertained, I just didn’t feel like wanting to put my thoughts on paper. And judging from the first three sentences above, my ability to construct clever sentences has seemed to deteriorate shamefully too (not that it was very good to begin with, of course). Boy, do I miss school and all the goodness it did to my lethargic brain…
Anyways, today my senses suddenly seized myself to mull over the ancient blogging rule #1 (invented by yours truly, so to speak) which I apparently have conveniently forgotten all this while: write honestly from the heart and the result need not necessarily be a beautiful composition. After all, if everyone writes beautifully, the expression ‘mediocre’ would never have made its way into the dictionary and consequently the terms ‘pitiable comments’ and if you’re (un)lucky, ‘insults’, would never see the light of day, which quite honestly, would be rather a shame to an otherwise colourful and diversified world.
OK, this particular blogger is being honestly stupid now. I will thus keep this short (and hopefully sweet. Lol) to minimise any embarrassment possibly inflicted by this wooly entry. My friends and I just said hello to 2006 by lighting up mini fireworks whilst simultaneously admiring other more magnificent ones outside the hostel building in a toe-breaking, minus-something weather. New Year celebrations here sure are massive- fireworks can be seen practically everywhere you turn your head to, with colours from every range intermingling in beautiful spectacles so delightful to the eyes. What a neat picture it would make, had I only charge my camera’s battery. Darn. All the same, it’s been an enjoyable night. I said my thanks to Allah for all the blessings I’ve been graced upon all my humble life and, like this inspiring song, I hope for better days in store for all of us in the future.
Better Days- Goo Goo Dolls
And you ask me what I want this year
And I try to make this kind and clear
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days
Coz I don't need boxes wrapped in strings
And desire and love and empty things
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days
So take these words
And sing out loud
Coz everyone is forgiven now
Coz tonight's the night the world begins again
And it's someplace simple where we could live
And something only you can give
And thats faith and trust and peace while we're alive
And the one poor child who saved this world
And there's 10 million more who probably could
If we all just stopped and said a prayer for them
So take these words
And sing out loud
Coz everyone is forgiven now
Coz tonight's the night the world begins again
I wish everyone was loved tonight
And somehow stop this endless fight
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days
So take these words
And sing out loud
Coz everyone is forgiven now
Coz tonight's the night the world begins again
Coz tonight's the night the world begins again
ps: I actually wrote this entry at 1am but couldn't post it due to some technical difficulties =)
